call it
art
or suicide

as the
camera
shows
your face
and
fingers

shows how
you
dress and
eat

shows how
you
drive and
fuck

shows it all
then
eats your
soul

whatever that is

might
have
a day
a few months
maybe
a few years
until
it all
disappears

your work was on
the sofa
with her arrival

that is why
there is piss all over
even
heard you crying

soft
sounded like a child

know you
try
and
never quite
get it right

stumble over
cracks
and bottles
empty of soda

who are you
anyway

filled with intention
good
real
forgotten words
relaxing
cocktail

having overcome
depression
elation
everything
but yourself
sings
like an apricot

born before rain
term oil existing
and
the guy on the corner
was
not right

i know because
i know

having
touched your hand
watched
you disappear

consider it a
date
for the future
consider it written
down

now
it can last
now
eternal

we have to talk

not about
trees or art
irish food or
diaries
forgotten
am not an editor
i write

we have to talk

not about
summer on the shore
winter with a sleeping bear
anything associated
with the past
except pizza

we have to talk

for one last time
and
why would you want
to
talk to me
anyway
point taken

we have to talk

had an uncle in the cavalry
road a horse and pretended
to be important
had maps with attack angles
everything written down
orders flowed wine in celebration
pills by the handful

what separated us was us
the distance between ocean city
and newaygo between
baltimore and st louis
who cares
me and you
and the highway
take a few tokens
fill those pockets with laughter
and magic
use your wand

came back missing
two fingers and most
of one mind
feeling obligated
to leave body parts
for the investigators

what the day brings
if you are lucky a
memory
luckier a happy
one
filled with
whatever
you want

wanted
then
wanted more
then
wanted
to take a shower
feel the water
warm
so i could
understand

tomorrow
never came
instead
i got a car
that
has a radio

drives me
home

as if
i
was not
a human being

it exists
in the spotlight
in
the shadows

unity
collective
take the wallet
start
bleeding
and save
the
paperwork

in a crisis
this war
continues
poisoned

is water
the
the only problem
business as usual
now
i’m gonna go
die

until then
remember
tell me something
good and
special